As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
