If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
