Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
