Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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