): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Randomize
