HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
