Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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