He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
