Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
