In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
