i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize