On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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