Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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