Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
