You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
