the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
