Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize