I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
