Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
