I smell stomach acid.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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