I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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