actually, I'm a sock model
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I need a beard to bite.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
