i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
