One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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