Walk of Shame. In a state park.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
