He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
