My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
