I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
