That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
