wat bout pragnant strippers??
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
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