Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
