How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
