Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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