found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
