On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
