We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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