Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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