thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
