why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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