So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
