You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
