you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
