Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
i believe in u and ur pee
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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