They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
