You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
