I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize