i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
