I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
