how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
