it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
